Bubba bear, clutter, and our life

For Christmas, Kurt's mother bought Erin a teddy bear. We aren't just talking any cute little teddy bear either. Nope, we're talking a HUGE bear so big that GG strapped it in the passenger seat of the SUV and drove it around town! Needless to say, when GG arrived at our home for the holidays, Kurt could tell that I was less than thrilled to see this giant monstrosity being lugged up our stairs. While Kurt reminded me that I was the one who chose a bear theme for Erin's room, GG was kind enough to reassure me that this would be the only "large" purchase she would make for Erin. She said that she bought the bear for Erin to enjoy crawling on when she got older. At the time, it seemed so far away and unlikely. However, in GG's defense, she was right. When Erin can't find Mt. Daddy or Mt. Mommy to climb over, Bubba Bear makes a fitting substitute. He is also a wonderful wrestling partner and apparently also makes a great Kleenex!

So, why was I resistant to such a large stuffed animal being in our home when I love all things teddy bear? Well, as a self-proclaimed "neat freak" whose favorite hobby is apparently throwing things out, Bubba was a symbol. His mere presence and size were a threat to the order I liked to believe our lives still had. He served as a herald of the materialism that I did not want our child to get caught up in, and as a warning of all the clutter and chaos that could potentially overtake our home and lives.

However, what I failed to realize at the time was that I AM a mother. Regardless of what toys Erin does or does not have, she is happy to leave a trail of them behind her. Yes, there are times when we deal with the aftermath of Hurricane Erin. Regardless of how often we try to clean, she will still find the last thing that Shadow brought in or find something to throw on the floor. Regardless of how often I try to stick to the plan for the day, Erin doesn't even realize there is a plan. As much as I might want to pay attention to detail, there's a cute little girl who would much rather that I pay attention to her, and I am more than happy to oblige.

So, this is our life. For better or worse, clutter and chaos are just part of where we are and being parents. I don't have to embrace the mess, but I embrace being the Mommy of the one who helps create it. Sure, there will be plenty of "hurricanes" in our house, but hopefully, the joyful moments and happy memories will far out-weigh even the biggest of Bubba Bears.

Be blessed,

Christine

P.S. I wouldn't trade Bubba bear and all the happiness he gives Erin for anything in the world. (But I still hope GG's promise is one I never have to remind her of!)

Mother's Day

Because May 10th was my first Mother’s Day, I thought I should write some form of post to commemorate the day. Sure, I could write about the events of the day, the highlights, the disappointments, or even the thoughtful gifts. Perhaps I could let everyone know Erin gave me chocolate covered strawberries to make up for the ones I couldn’t have when I was pregnant. In many ways, May 10th was a day not unlike so many of the ones in the eleven months preceding it.

However, none of that is what really mattered. On my first Mother’s Day, I just wanted to know that it mattered to someone that I am Erin’s mother. However, in the end I didn’t need a special present to tell me that or even someone else. All I really had to do was look into my little girl’s sweet face and listen to my heart to know.

You see, no other title that I hold will ever be as important, amazing, or life-changing as this one. I helped to create an amazing little human being. I continue to love, nurture, and care for her every day. There is no other job in this world that will ever be as difficult or as rewarding. Regardless of whether it matters to anyone else, it matters to Erin and it matters to me. I AM Erin’s mommy, and I am SO lucky.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the mommies out there – every day.

Love,

Christine

Neurologist follow-up

Wow, it's hard to believe that just six months ago we were taking Erin to the neurologist, Dr. Ghodsi, for the first time to make sure there was not some hidden cause for her torticolis.

Was it really just before Christmas that we worried about anesthesia, MRIs, abnormal findings, and referrals to neurosurgeons? It seems so strange to think that just a few short months ago that was our reality. However, a lot can change in six months. Since then, Erin was cleared by the neurosurgeon, met all of her age-appropriate developmental milestones, and her torticolis continues to improve with weekly physical therapy.

So, it came as a little bit of a shock to flip the calendar to May and see a six month follow-up appointment with Dr. Ghodsi on the page in front of me. With everything seemingly going so well for Erin, I really debated whether or not we even needed to keep the appointment. However, in the end, I knew that I could never live with myself if something is actually wrong with Erin and we didn't find out.

So, this morning we got in the car and headed to the neurologist's office. Of course they did the standard checks for height, weight, head circumference (Erin is still in the 95th percentile), lung sounds, heart sounds, and pulse, as well as more specific neurological tests. And, I must say, it was really nice to have Dr. Ghodsi confirm what every mother thinks of her child (at least until the terrible twos hit!) - he said she's perfect. I can't tell you how relieved I am to know that Erin does not have any neurological problems. I feel so blessed for us and for Erin.

The last thing Dr. Ghodsi said was that we could follow-up "as needed". That's one follow-up we won't ever plan on needing!

A mouthful

Erin is now getting her 9th tooth - a molar! It started to break through the surface of her gum line earlier this week - with the accompanying pain, fussiness, and crying in the middle of the night. Luckily, all of it is short-term (I've been told the temper tantrums resolve when they go to college!). However, I think my favorite part of Erin's teething is the excessive drool. Just in time for Erin to learn how to "kiss" us - which entails opening her mouth wide, sticking out her tongue, and then leaning in to our faces. I think she learned this technique from Shadow!